Belligerent Smoking Clowns

Flashback Friday Story Time!
Story Time.
For Those Of You Who’ve Heard This Before:
I’ve never liked Clowns. Mimes included.
They are Not Funny.
They are Creepy and Obnoxious.
They Frighten Babies.
Flashback to 1994….
When Ariel was 10 days old, and I finally felt like leaving the house (she was the result of major surgery … damned kid decided not to be born after 32 hours of labor…. and the epidural didn’t work…) we decided to go to a local diner (Willie’s) for dinner. This was back when they still had *smoking* sections.
Took Ariel with us; she was sleeping quietly in her little car seat thingie which I lugged in with me, requested nonsmoking (I’m very allergic & besides had an infant with me), and were escorted to the nonsmoking section– a large room in the back of the diner.
We sat along the wall at a table with a bench behind it as it was a good place to plop the baby down…
No sooner than we’d placed our orders, a group of people started filing in —
A large group of people… men and women, some in regular garb, others in costume & full makeup… they were Clowns!!
About 30 of them!!
And they were loud!!
And …. they were SMOKING.
And a few of the Smoking Clowns plopped themselves down next to us & proceeded to get in Ariel’s face.
Of course she woke up & started fussing (remember she was 10 days old).
I mentioned that they were in a nonsmoking section and they started to get belligerent….
I was getting mad.
And my husband was being his usual nonchalant self… not helping matters any…
(so it turns out this was a Clown Convention that was in town & Weren’t We Lucky…)
And 10-day -old Ariel was fussing & then our food came & some Obnoxious Loud Belligerent Clown Broad comes over & sticks her smoking face right in Ariel’s face & Ariel SCREAMED bloody murder…
I told the Hideous Clown Broad that she was not only scaring my baby but was indeed endangering her health, and she got even more nasty and belligerent saying “well it’s my right to smoke if i want” and I said “not in my child’s face it isn’t so get the hell out of our faces unless you’re actually *on* fire in which case you’ll find yourself doused in about TWO seconds” and I picked up my glass of water & she backed off …..
And the Idiot Greek Manager said he couldn’t do anything because there wasn’t room for them in the smoking section.
But he didn’t charge for my dinner.
That was Ariel’s first experience with Clowns.
And it was about two years before I went back to that particular Diner.
They’ve remodeled long since but I still think of that incident when I go there.
Which is, pretty much *never*.
::Please Make A Note Of It::


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