Screaming Metal Death Trap

::Oh Goody::
I received a Letter in the Mail the other day from the Ford Motor Company informing me that my 2001 Ford Explorer is in need of “An Important Safety Recall Repair”.
Basically it tells me the following:
“Safety Recall 05S28: Speed Control Deactivation Switch Fire
SUMMARY:
FORD IS RECALLING MODEL YEARS 1995-2002 EXPLORER VEHICLES EQUIPPED WITH THE TEXAS INSTRUMENTS SPEED CONTROL DEACTIVATION SWITCH (SCDS). THE SCDS MAY LEAK INTERNALLY AND THEN OVERHEAT, SMOKE, OR BURN.
CONSEQUENCE:
A VEHICLE FIRE COULD OCCUR WITH OR WITHOUT THE ENGINE RUNNING.”
The Letter goes on to say that
“A Fire can occur even if the Key is NOT in the Ignition, and can occur even if the Speed Control System is NEVER USED.
Until your vehicle is repaired, please park your Vehicle away from Structures to Prevent Your Underhood Fire from Spreading.”
So basically it’s telling me that my car can BURST INTO FLAMES at ANY GIVEN MOMENT *regardless* of whether it’s running or not.
Moments from now, my car may or may not turn into a FLAMING BALL OF DEATH.
And here I am worried about the fact that I have almost Zero Front Shocks and my Tires Randomly Lose Air…
I Take Comfort in Knowing that I Do Indeed Drive a Screaming Metal Death Trap.
::Please Make A Note Of It::

Screaming Metal Death Trap Fireball XL5

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